Wednesday, March 18, 2026

The Way I Used To Be by Amber Smith

 



The book starts off with 14-year-old Eden dealing with head-on trauma. With many failed attempts to tell her friends and family about said trauma. Eden decides she's just gonna keep it to herself, as many in her situation do; she believes no one will believe her. Barely coping, we watch as she handles this trauma the best way she knows how. 

“I feel these forbidden thoughts creep in sometimes without warning. Slow thoughts that always start quietly, like whispers you're not even sure you're hearing. And then they get louder and louder until they become every sound in the entire world. Thoughts that can't be undone.
Would anyone care?
Would anyone even fucking notice?
What if one day I just wasn't here anymore?
What if one day it all just stopped?

For me, this book starts off slow. And after reading it in its entirety, I do understand why that is. I'm just impatient lol. Some of the events in this book were hard to read without crying because of how close to home this book hit. Personally, I think this book should be read by EVERYONE!! especially those who believe they are all alone. But more so for those whose loved ones have survived trauma of any kind.

This book also doesn't have a traditional HEA ending. However, it does have a holding on to hope vibe, which I felt was very fitting.

Now the question remains... do I continue this series? Have you read it? If so, is it gonna break my heart further? 😬

⭐⭐⭐.5

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